united-tattoo/docs/united_tattoo_brand_language_guidelines.md

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United Tattoo Brand Language Guidelines

Version: 1.0
Maintainers: United Tattoo Team
Source: Brainstorming session facilitated by Business Analyst Mary (Dec 19, 2024)

Purpose

  • Codify a practical, comprehensive rulebook for United Tattoos voice and language.
  • Transform generic or corporate-sounding copy into authentic, human United Tattoo communication.
  • Provide checklists, templates, and examples that are simple to adopt across all customer touchpoints.

Guiding Principle

  • Would a human being actually say this? If not, rewrite it.

Foundations

  • Respect customer intelligence. Avoid buzzwords, empty promises, and performance language.
  • 7th grade reading level maximum. No one should re-read a sentence to understand it.
  • Keep it practical, honest, and grounded in real tattoo shop interactions.
  • Prefer brevity and clarity over cleverness.
  • Talk like an expert who is comfortable and kind—not like a brand trying to impress.

Core Language Rules (from First Principles)

  1. Direct acknowledgment beats diplomatic deflection

    • Rationale: When you leave things unsaid, people fill in the blanks and feel judged. Plain, friendly honesty prevents that.
    • Bad: “We understand everyone has different comfort levels.”
    • Good: “Holy-fuck yeah— thats a lot.”
  2. Offer practical solutions, not emotional theater

    • Rationale: Beautiful humans interacting with beautiful humans. No therapy sessions or performative empathy.
    • Bad: “We create a safe space where you feel supported.”
    • Good: “If you need a break, say the word. We can step out, take a smoke break, just hang out.”
  3. Plain speaking about pricing/time

    • Example: “Because this is ~6 inches and the linework/shading will add ~2 hours, Id be comfortable doing this for $650. Does that work for you?”
    • Principle: Transparent, specific, respectful.
  4. Handle difficult clients with patience, like a human

    • No elaborate customer service scripts.
    • Solve the actual problem in front of you, calmly.
  5. Describe work in quantifiable terms with justified confidence

    • Bad: “93% proficient in opaques.”
    • Good: “Ive been doing opaques on shading for 5 years. Want to see a few examples so you can judge for yourself?”
    • Principle: If you cant justify it with work or experience, dont say it.
  6. Talk about other shops with kindness

    • Quote: “The shop doesnt fucking matter. Its a building with some idiots in it. People come for the idiots.”
    • Focus on the artists and the work, not competitive positioning.

Voice and Tone

  • Human, direct, and warm—but not performative.
  • Use mild profanity naturally when it fits; never to posture.
  • Show empathy through actions offered (breaks, pacing, clarity), not scripted emotions.
  • Confidence is quiet and justified—show your receipts (portfolio, years, examples).
  • Inclusive in a normal, human way. Avoid theatrical inclusion statements; prefer direct welcome.

Style Standards

  • Reading level: Grade 7 or lower.
  • Contractions: Use them. Sounds human.
  • Jargon: Minimize. If needed, explain briefly.
  • Numbers & estimates: Be specific when you can (inches, hours, dollar ranges).
  • Swearing: Mild, natural, never as an aesthetic. Dont punch down. Dont overdo it.
  • Capitalization & punctuation: Standard English. Avoid Title Case inside sentences. Use em dashes sparingly.
  • Avoid abstract metaphors and grandiose claims.

AntiPatterns (Never Say)

  • “For the ones who live loud, tattoo proud, and believe in better”
  • “This isnt your average tattoo shop”
  • “Were here to rewrite the narrative”
  • “Where everyone feels seen, respected, and hyped to walk through our doors”
  • “Elevate the experience”
  • “Create a space where real connection matters”
  • “We hire great people, not just great artists”
  • “Bring both skill and soul to the table”
  • “Every tattoo here is a story, a statement, and a shared moment” Why: Forced verbs, defensive positioning, buzzword soup, vague feelgood performance language.

Preferred Patterns (Do Say)

  • “Weve been tattooing for X years. Heres our work.”
  • “Good tattoos thatll still look good in 20 years.”
  • “Artists who know what theyre doing.”
  • “It doesnt matter who you are— youve got a home here.”

Copy Transformation Framework Use this 4step filter to convert bad copy into United Tattoo voice.

Step 1: Strip the theater

  • Delete buzzwords, transformation language, and vague hype.
  • Translate abstract claims into plain, observable facts.

Step 2: Ground in reality

  • Add concrete details: sizes, hours, dollar ranges, what will actually happen.

Step 3: Offer actions, not feelings

  • Add helpful options (breaks, pacing, next step, example links) instead of performative empathy.

Step 4: Read like a human

  • Contractions. Short sentences. Grade7 reading level. Ask “Would a human say this?”

Transformation Checklist

  • No buzzwords or vague promises remain
  • Concrete details replace abstract claims
  • Practical options offered (what the person can do next)
  • Grade7 reading level or lower
  • Sounds like a human, not a brand
  • Confidence is justified with examples/time/experience

Templates and Patterns

Pricing Template

  • “Because [size/specs] and [technique/complexity], this will take about [hours]. Id be comfortable doing it for [$amount or $range]. Does that work for you?”
  • “If you want to keep it closer to [$lower], we can simplify [specific parts].”

Aftercare Callout

  • “Read our aftercare instructions (informed by the National Environmental Health Associations Body Art Model Code).”
  • Keep the main page short. Link to the details.

Nervous FirstTimer

  • “Being nervous is normal— we all were before our first tattoo. If you need a break at any time, say the word. We can step out, take a smoke break, or just hang out. Well go at your pace.”

Picky Client (Lots of References)

  • “Thats a lot— which is fine. Grab a seat and walk me through the top 23 things you care about most. Well build from there.”

Tattoo Style Explanations

  • “This is realism. This is American traditional. This is neotraditional. This is cyber sigilism.” (Short, clear, label things plainly. Link to examples.)

Difficult Situations

  • “I hear you. Here are two ways we can solve this today: [Option A], [Option B]. Your call.”

Before/After Examples

Example 1

  • Original: “Artistry with integrity.”
  • United Tattoo: “Weve been tattooing for [X years]. Heres our work.” [link]

Example 2

  • Original: “More than ink— its identity.”
  • United Tattoo: “Good tattoos thatll look good in 20 years.”

Example 3

  • Original: “A space where creativity thrives.”
  • United Tattoo: “Artists who know what theyre doing.”

Example 4 (Inclusivity Hype)

  • Original: “Were here to rewrite the narrative, where everyone feels seen, respected, and hyped to walk through our doors.”
  • United Tattoo: “It doesnt matter who you are— youve got a home here.”

Reading Level and QA

  • Standard: Grade7 max.
  • Tools: Use any readability checker (e.g., FleschKincaid or Hemingway). Adjust until it passes.
  • QA Checks:
    • Short, clear sentences
    • Concrete details
    • No buzzwords/performance language
    • Offers practical next steps
    • Tone: calm, confident, kind

Governance

  • Ownership: Content lead and shop manager signoff on highimpact pages (pricing, aftercare, booking, artist bios).
  • Review cadence: Quarterly review of top pages. Spotcheck new pages at publish time.
  • Updates: When adding new styles/services, add 12 plain examples + portfolio links. Rerun transformation checklist.
  • Training: New hires read this guide and do one transformation exercise before publishing copy.

Implementation Plan (from Action Planning)

  1. Implement Reading Level Standard

    • Audit all website copy
    • Create a simple readinglevel checklist
    • Rewrite problem areas
    • Target: 23 weeks
  2. Create Brand Language LLM Filter

    • Document rules (this guide)
    • Build before/after examples set
    • Draft initial prompt template (see below), test on worst offenders
    • Target: 12 weeks
  3. Transform HighImpact Pages First

    • Prioritize pricing, aftercare, artist bios, booking flow
    • A/B test if possible; otherwise collect anecdotal feedback
    • Target: ~1 week

LLM Brand Filter Prompt Template Use this with your preferred LLM to transform drafts automatically.

""" You are the United Tattoo Brand Language Filter.

Transform the following copy into United Tattoo voice using these rules:

  • Human, direct, grade7 reading level max
  • No buzzwords, no transformation theater
  • Offer practical options/actions instead of performative empathy
  • Justified confidence only (backed by examples/experience)
  • Prefer concrete details (sizes, hours, dollar ranges)
  • Would a human actually say this?

Output format:

  1. Original
  2. Rule Violations Found (bullets)
  3. Transformed Version
  4. Notes (what changed and why, keep brief)

Copy: [PASTE TEXT HERE] """

FAQ Fragments and Microcopy

Booking CTA

  • “Book a consult”
  • “Message an artist”
  • “Get a price range”

Portfolio Nudge

  • “Here are 6 pieces similar to what you want.”

Rescheduling

  • “If something changes, tell us as soon as you can and well rebook you.”

Deposits

  • “Deposits lock the spot and go toward your total. If you cancel lastminute, they dont come back— our artists set aside that time.”

TouchUps

  • “If something heals weird, message us. Well take a look and figure out the best fix.”

Quality Claims (Justified Only)

  • “Weve done [X] sleeves and [Y] portraits this year. Here are a few.” [link]

Appendix: Why This Matters

  • Corporate speak looks “professional” but actually insults intelligence and creates distance.
  • Authentic shop communication = vulnerability + practicality + justified confidence.
  • Brevity with clarity builds more trust than verbose claims.
  • Credibility comes from clear examples, clean portfolios, and honest constraints— not big words.

Quick Reference Cards (Printable)

Card A: 6 Rules

  • Direct over diplomatic
  • Practical over performative
  • Plain pricing/time
  • Human patience
  • Justified confidence
  • Kind to other shops

Card B: Do/Dont

  • Do: short, concrete, helpful
  • Dont: buzzwords, vague promises, defensive positioning

Card C: Rapid Pricing Script

  • “Because [size/specs] and [technique], ~[hours]. Comfortable at [$]. If you want to stay near [$lower], we can simplify [parts]. Work for you?”

Card D: Nervous FirstTimer

  • “Nervous is normal. Say break anytime. Well go at your pace.”

End of Guidelines